Tuesday, December 2, 2008

A beautiful day...

My sweet husband and a couple other friends had mentioned praying for the results of the mammogram to be negative(in a positive way) and I got to thinking as I went through the motions of getting ready to go to the appointment for my doctor to give me the results, about what if this sends us into another step on this journey...I don't mean to sound overly calm...I was a little bit like a child when they feel uncertain, or their footing is slipping a little and they say "maMA?!" where their voice goes up at the end a little bit...I said "LorD?! What if...and I'm at this appointment by myself and Lord what if I have to call him at work and that would be sad for him, and what if I have to go and be tired again and now I have 3 kids..." and then He took my face in His Hands and said "Laura..." and I thought, "Oh yeah... :)  sorry..."  So then we had a good little time of smiling into the uncertainty and singing together(quietly in the cold little exam room with that little scrap of a gown that offers no warmth) about how He's good. Period. and He knows. and i know i don't. But that I trust Him...and that's just it. It was a BEAUTIFUL time, He was THERE and...I think maybe the enemy might have been a little ticked off, which is good. But what I really care about is that there was no other comfort in those moments together...so often I have reached out to other people, or knowledge, or chocolate...but it was all Him and it was sweet. And that sweetness was not diminished or strengthened by the fact that the mammogram was clear...it was just what it was, and that didn't have much to do with my efforts or great focus or positive attitude or "strong religious faith"...just my Friend.

2 comments:

Jen said...

Laura-I'm so glad to find your blog so that we can stay in touch! I blog too-I can send you the info if you are interested (the one this blogger profile links to is now defunct)

Glad we are back in touch!

-Jen Wright

boones said...

Thanks for sharing....it was just the reminder I needed today. He is such an amazing friend...NO one brings the peace and comfort that HE does. I am also reminded of the verse from Ex. 33 where God tells Moses, "My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest." Amen....you saw that clearly through this experience.
Hugs,
~meredith